Hi again :)
Because it is really hard to explain how ADD affect people concerned I just will write what's coming in my mind. ^^
So I didn't eplained why AD(H)D people have problem with concentrate on thing. So here a explanation.
Well you could say we have a damaged brain, but actually it isn't...it just works not the same way than others.
The easiest way to explain it then is with a "filter" door. People without AD(H)D can close this door when there are unimportant information and open it for important stuff. A person with AD(H)D can't, the door don't exist it's just a doorframe and every single information can go throught.
Now with this information, try to imaginate a normal lunch in a canteen,I mean it is a every day situation...totaly normal and nothing exhausting therby...Well for a AD(H)D person it is. They will hear the neighbour talking with eachother and the neighbours neighbourgs, the different smells, the movment of other peoples, the sound of the dishes, the chewing sound, the sound form a near street and want to focus on the conversation who is going on with their company. Every other person could blend at least some noises out an ADD person can't really...That's why alot of AD(H)D persons will say "Sorry, I coudn't understand you. Could you say it again please?" and maybe not just once. And yeah for us it is also very nerve-wracking to ask again and again and YES we are frustraited to ask and sometime after maybe the fourth time asking the same stupid question we just will say "It's ok, I got it" or smile and nod, because we won't to look or feel stupid. Eventhought we didn't understand what you were saying. And here comes the problem with the low self-esteem, because we have problem with focusing on one thing and have to ask so much questions. Others and ourself think we are stupide and dumb. As an AD(H)D child you often hear more criticism than praise. Because a lot of "easy" task we can't do or won't do it properly enought for a "normal" person. I had and also have the problem, that lots of people think I didn't have read my text through, because there are so many careless mistake. BUT and that's the sad truth I have read the text more than five times extreamly focused and the sadder truth is, when I say I've read it five times trought and I was focused by doing it they don't belive me. Some think I'm a lazy "piece of shit", but luckly every person who know me a little bit more than just "Hi and Bye" will say that I'm every thing but certainly not lazy.
And because I have heared a lot of such things as "You are stupide, lazy and you won't make it" when I was at school, my self-estim was beyond zero at this time. I mean I really tried to focus on things and tried to understand things in school and then the only thing that I hear is try to focus more. Yeas, I'm already focusing as hard as I can. I'm sorry that I can't suck up information like a spoon, well I can but my brain can't filter every information so I have to do it manually. Most of AD(H)D people will starting feeling usless and helpless and becoming sadder and sadder and because they feeling so usless and sad they sometimes becoming aggressiv towards other people. I mean, we realize that something is wrong with us and we don't get alot of things straight in our heads, we try to becoming better but the only feedback that we get is you should focus more and try it harder is so frustraiting that the frustration becomes anger towords us and others. We get more tensed and the always becoming so much information make it even harder to just relaxe for a moment and the pressure grows and grows. And you know what happens to a little box who stands under presure. If the presure is high enought the box will explode, the same applies to people, not just the AD(H)D people.
There is also one thing that isn't mentioned in alot of AD(H)D "progress report" or I read,watched the wrong once ^^'
A AD(H)D person are normally very openminded, joyfulle, trustfully and honest people, but because a lot of them bevel in every day just because they are what they are. I guess they change and became not so honest and trustfully because they learned, that some people won't hear the truth and other won't get along with the AD(H)D. And that is ok but very sad, because ADD people normally haven't big problems in understanding others emotions and are often very emphatic but mind, they have some problem to explain their own feelings and what's going on. One of the reseasons why we don't understand our feelings is the mood swings that we have. From a sudden we are totaly sad and actually can't say why we are and in the other moment we're happy. That can be very exhausting for ourself and also for every one else around us. And because we know that we can be exhaustign, we actually don't like to talk a lot about ourself. Also we don't have to explain so much when we don't talk much about ourself.
I guess and hope that today I could give you a small insight of a AD(H)D mind and how we feel.
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